Ajay (name changed) called me up at my extn and asked me to come to Terminal for a coffee. His voice was not as usual and i had guessed that something has gone wrong. We took coffee and placed ourselves at the seats of near by table. Until then the conversion was casual. Before i open my mouth, all of sudden he started crying.. he started crying like a child. I didn’t stop him. Men are conditioned to not to cry. No matter what happens, you should not cry. This is what their subconscious mind instructs. If a man is crying, well you know.. the matter is very very very serious. After five minutes or so, he stopped crying and said “she deceived me“.
This incident happened 6 months back. Why i am telling you this now?
Last week, she got married ofcourse to some other guy and not to Ajay. And he is still unable to forget her after six months of break up and even if she got married.
Ajay is a type of person who always smiles, makes everyone cheer and very friendly. You have to meet to him to know him. Now also he does the same thing. He smiles at everyone.. a false smile that covers the scar. He smiles to hide his tears.
Why men cannot forget that whatever happened? Why can’t they move on?
How women adapt themselves so easily within a short span of time? Don’t they have heart? Don’t they feel?
Why woman do this? Why she dumps him?
Q. Why men cannot forget that whatever happened? Why can’t they move on?
A: Answer is already given. Men are not conditioned to accept failure. They are not conditioned to hear “NO”. A male child grows in a family with all privileges. He will get whatever he wants from his parents, be it a chocolate or a bicycle or a bike. He gets it. His mom never says no to him and gives him whatever he wants. He was not conditioned to hear NO since from his childhood. There time comes when someone makes him this realize.. when someone dumps him. He spend his whole life wondering “how she could do this to him ? ” Well, he forgets that “she” is not his “mom“.
Q. How women adapt themselves so easily within a short span of time? Don’t they have heart? Don’t they feel?
A: How they adapt so easily? God made them that way. Don’t they have heart? Yes, they have. Don’t they feel? Don’t they get hurt? Yes, they will. It is not that women forget everything very easily. But, they adapt themselves to new environment very easily. That’s why a man takes ages to forget the one he loved and a woman a very short span of time. If she gets someone to console her at that time, she won’t take much time to get back to normal routine life.
Q. Why woman do this? Why she dumps him?
A: Answer for this is the title of the post. “Grass is always green at the other side of the fence”. There is one school of thought saying, “you should not search for the reason. You will never be able to find it through out your life”.
B. R. Lakman Rao (BRL) has penned down a beautiful poem to describe the emotions of a man who was dumped by his love.
hELi hOgu kaaraNa hOguva modalu
nanna baaLiniMda dUraaguva modaluolaveMba haNate edeyalli beLagi
beLakaade baaLige
iMdEke hIge beLakannu toredu
nI saride neraLige ?
iMdyaava baMdha toDaride
ninna kaalige ?
suDubeMki beLaku uLiyite
nanna paalige ?savibhaavagaLige nI naada nIDi
jotegUDi haaDide
iMdyaava aLalu ? sereyubbi koraLu
nI mauna taaLide
nI neTTu beLesida I mara
phala toTTa vELege
hIgEke muridu UruLide
yaava daaLige ?- bi aar lakShmaNaraav.
Lyrics taken from : http://www.kannadalyrics.com/?q=node/1377c
C Ashwath has sung this song beautifully and is also available online for purchase.
Also, there is one kannada novel on this subject “Heli Hogu Karana” written by Ravi Belagere. If you know kannada, do read it. That’s one of finest works of Ravi Belagere. You can buy the book online from Total Kannada Dot com website. The whole book tries to prove one point “Why Grass is green on the other side?”
Good to know you too listen to Bhavageethes. Bhavageethe will be subject of our next blea.
dude…a nice post… but.. its more complex than how simply u have put it here…:D will prolly write somethin bout this in my blaaag as well !!
you made this story short and crisp..watever happens we need to move on in life..
I think you got it all wrong Harsha. May be you got this guy(Ajay) completely wrong. Yes, losing someone you love is indeed painful be it gals or guys. May be what hurt him most is the fact the everything he believed in was shattered in a second. His trust in people and almighty was challenged. The “WHY ME?” question must have hurt him more than anything else. Another thing is that you cant just generalize this between guys and gals.Yes gals are more emotionally stable,they are fast at moving on, but the pain is still the same. May be he was just unfortunate enough to pick up the bad apple from the bunch
Small correction Harsha, it been 8 months and 20 days
@thej sure
@vinay yes it’s more complex .. infact it cannot be explained in words.. just tried to put up small post on that. I could have written more.
@anu yes we need to learn to move on. I think but its not so easy
@jithin No jithin.. i didn’t get him wrong. But yes i have made injustice to him and to this post by not writing everything. I have revealed very little. As said above for vinay’s comment, I could have written more. since i have generalized the topic, you may feel that I got Ajay wrong. I know him very well. But yes i didn’t put up everything
@ajay
I hope you won’t mind as i have written about you. If you want this post to be removed, I will do.
Hi all,
It is true that gals are more emotionally strong than guys, I have had a practical exp two times, first time it took me 8 months to come out of all that happened, and please answer this question if anybody can, why its easy for a girl to ditch someone??!!!!!